Barriers to Getting Help
When you’re helping a friend in an abusive relationship, it can be frustrating when they don’t want to get help for their situation or if they’re unsure about getting help. While getting help might seem obvious to you, there are many barriers to getting help that your friend might be considering too. Remember to keep these barriers in mind when talking with your friend. Allow your friend to express their concerns and fears and to talk about it together.
Barriers to Getting Help
- Fear of hurting their dating partner’s feelings
- Fear that the friend who they confide in will tell them to end the relationship
- Fear of losing independence from one’s parents
- Fear of getting into trouble with one’s parents
- Fear that people will not understand, will blame them, or won’t believe what’s happened
- Not knowing how or where to get help
- Fear of retaliation from the abusive dating partner
- Not knowing how to leave or improve the situation
- Embarrassment
- Fear of people finding out they are gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgender
- Fear of being judged
- Fear that friends/family will use the abuse to justify their own homophobia/transphobia
- Not trusting that what is said will be kept confidential
- Not wanting to admit that it’s a real problem
It’s never easy to help a friend, but remember that they are the expert in their own life and will make the choices that they feel are best for them.